I support any anime that discourages girls from wearing pants.

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I was see First Episode of that Anime ... But I dont like it 4 now ..
Propably I will watch That later when I will be in bether mood ^^

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Magical Girls hehehehe When I was Young I was Like things Like that ^^

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Nice anime blog,5 out of 5 stars!

I love to see girls in anime wearing short paldas.

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Hey. I absolutely love this blog, it's got a lot of detail and pictures to really let the fans know about the episode. As well as other news snippets =). I just wanted to say thanks. And for those having trouble finding where to download this release, I thought I'd recommend http://hqanime.blogspot.com/ which has a lot of the newest anime releases. Again, wonderful post! I'll definitely stick around for more~

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I have an existential map; it has 'you are here' written all over it.

I don't approve of political jokes... I've seen too many of them get elected.

Military glory -- that attractive rainbow, that rises in showers of blood -- that serpent's eye, that charms to destroy...

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.

The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins.

Paramount among the responsibilities of a free press is the duty to prevent any part of the government from deceiving the people.

Not even computers will replace committees, because committees buy computers.

To sit alone with my conscience will be judgment enough for me.

Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.

You're about as useful as a one-legged man at an arse kicking contest.

Everything has been figured out, except how to live.

Politically Correct UNIX System VI Release notes

Smith & Wesson — the original point and click interface.

All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl.

Sex is like air. It's only a big deal if you can't get any.

Programming is one of the most difficult branches of applied mathematics; the poorer mathematicians had better remain pure mathematicians.

Democracy is where you can say what you think even if you don't think.

Humor is the only test of gravity, and gravity of humor; for a subject which will not bear raillery is suspicious, and a jest which will not bear serious examination is false wit.

I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.

If the United Nations once admits that international disputes can be settled by using force, then we will have destroyed the foundation of the organization and our best hope of establishing a world order.

Quoting Coulter is kind of like quoting Joe McCarthy; no doubt it does well when you're pandering to a group of like-minded hate mongerers, but it earns you a well-deserved reputation as a vicious, mean-spirited airhead and intellecual lightweight in more analytical and dispassionate circles.

There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?

There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?

We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out.

Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

Before C++ we had to code all of our bugs by hand; now we inherit them.

Computers can figure out all kinds of problems, except the things in the world that just don't add up.

Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.

I have spoken many a word, therefore, it is fact.

If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?

Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana. The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two but can't remember what they are.

Never test for an error condition you don't know how to handle.

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

My current job sucks so hard, black holes are going green with envy.

Deliver yesterday, code today, think tomorrow.

There are some experiences in life which should not be demanded twice from any man, and one of them is listening to the Brahms Requiem.

To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer.

My last cow just died, so I won't need your bull anymore.

Life would be so much easier if we could just see the source code.

Computer Science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes

The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears this is true.

Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.

Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.

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So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me

There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.

Only one man ever understood me, and he didn't understand me.

Your Highness, I have no need of this hypothesis.

I took a course in speed reading and was able to read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It's about Russia.

We all agree that your theory is crazy, but is it crazy enough?

Future historians will be able to study at the Jimmy Carter Library, the Gerald Ford Library, the Ronald Reagan Library, and the Bill Clinton Adult Bookstore.

Heav'n hath no rage like love to hatred turn'd, Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorn'd.

Heav'n hath no rage like love to hatred turn'd, Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorn'd.

A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.

Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft... and the only one that can be mass produced with unskilled labor.

If you put tomfoolery into a computer, nothing comes out of it but tomfoolery. But this tomfoolery, having passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow enobled and no-one dares criticize it.

Never test for an error condition you don't know how to handle.

I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it's fantastic.

Either he's dead or my watch has stopped.

The company doesn't tell me what to say, and I don't tell themwhere to stick it.

If electricity comes from electrons, does that mean that morality comes from morons?

As nightfall does not come at once, neither does oppression. In both instances, there is a twilight when everything remains unchanged. And it is in such twilight that we all must be most aware of change in the air — however slight — lest we become unwitting victims of the darkness.

Always do right- this will gratify some and astonish the rest.

Always do right- this will gratify some and astonish the rest.

Humor is a rubber sword - it allows you to make a point without drawing blood.

Always do right- this will gratify some and astonish the rest.

Always do right- this will gratify some and astonish the rest.

Man has no right to kill his brother. It is no excuse that he does so in uniform: he only adds the infamy of servitude to the crime of murder.

Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.

I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with typewriters.

The most overlooked advantage of owning a computer is that if they foul up there's no law against whacking them around a bit.

Minsky's Second Law: Don't just do something. Stand there.

When the rich think about the poor, they have poor ideas.

He managed to stupid himself right into the White House.

Why did God create dentists? -- In his infinite love, he thought it would be charitable to His creatures to let them see what Hell is like, during their lives.

Inanimate objects can be classified scientifically into three major categories; those that don't work, those that break down and those that get lost.

Sailors ought never to go to church. They ought to go to hell, where it is much more comfortable.

Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.

If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?

The cynics are right nine times out of ten.

Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me.

The bureaucracy is expanding to meet the needs of an expanding bureaucracy.

There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.

Don't be so humble - you are not that great.

Nothing is wrong with California that a rise in the ocean level wouldn't cure.

There is no sincerer love than the love of food.

You ask me if I keep a notebook to record my great ideas. I've only ever had one.

Cholesterol is your natural defence against excessive circulation of blood, which can carry venoms, poisons and other toxins around your body.

Did you ever walk in a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives.

What is morally wrong can never be advantageous, even when it enables you to make some gain that you believe to be to your advantage.

What is morally wrong can never be advantageous, even when it enables you to make some gain that you believe to be to your advantage.

Early to rise and early to bed. Makes a male healthy, wealthy and dead.

Before the war is ended, the war party assumes the divine right to denounce and silence all opposition to war as unpatriotic and cowardly.

What is morally wrong can never be advantageous, even when it enables you to make some gain that you believe to be to your advantage.

A state of war only serves as an excuse for domestic tyranny.

What is morally wrong can never be advantageous, even when it enables you to make some gain that you believe to be to your advantage.

If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens?

The instinct of nearly all societies is to lock up anybody who is truly free. First, society begins by trying to beat you up. If this fails, they try to poison you. If this fails too, the finish by loading honors on your head.

The instinct of nearly all societies is to lock up anybody who is truly free. First, society begins by trying to beat you up. If this fails, they try to poison you. If this fails too, the finish by loading honors on your head.

My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn't take it out of my garden.

If you believe in telekinesis, raise my hand.

USA Today has come out with a new survey: Apparently three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population.

USA Today has come out with a new survey: Apparently three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population.

Am I lightheaded because I'm not dead or because I'm still alive?

To understand a man you should walk a mile in his shoes. If what he says still bothers you that's ok because you'll be a mile away from him and you'll have his shoes.

To understand a man you should walk a mile in his shoes. If what he says still bothers you that's ok because you'll be a mile away from him and you'll have his shoes.

I'm desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets.

I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave on a Saturday night and, most especially, never to shave a Gentile woman on a Saturday night.

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.

If all the world's managers were laid end to end, it would be an improvement.

A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.

A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.

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If you need more than five lines to prove something, then you are on the wrong track

Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.

Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.

A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing but together can decide that nothing can be done.

I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.

If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you.

The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people.

If you take something apart and put it back together again enough times, you will eventually have enough parts left over to build a second one.

If you take something apart and put it back together again enough times, you will eventually have enough parts left over to build a second one.

What is morally wrong can never be advantageous, even when it enables you to make some gain that you believe to be to your advantage.

What is morally wrong can never be advantageous, even when it enables you to make some gain that you believe to be to your advantage.

An intellectual is someone who has found something more interesting than sex.

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'S relativity.

Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.

Humor is a rubber sword - it allows you to make a point without drawing blood.

Humor is a rubber sword - it allows you to make a point without drawing blood.

Object-oriented programming is a style of programming designed to teach students about stacks.

It is better to be quotable than to be honest.

Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

Early to rise and early to bed. Makes a male healthy, wealthy and dead.

A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing but together can decide that nothing can be done.

A hen is only an eggÂ’s way of making another egg.

A hen is only an eggÂ’s way of making another egg.

He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know.

Early to rise and early to bed. Makes a male healthy, wealthy and dead.

Blessed is the man, who having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact.

The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears this is true.

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No one can earn a million dollars honestly.

TV is called a medium because it is neither rare nor well done.

Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.

Cholesterol is your natural defence against excessive circulation of blood, which can carry venoms, poisons and other toxins around your body.

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.

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I'm not under the alkafluence of inkahol that some thinkle peep I am. It's just the drunker I sit here the longer I get.

I'm not under the alkafluence of inkahol that some thinkle peep I am. It's just the drunker I sit here the longer I get.

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.

If electricity comes from electrons, does that mean that morality comes from morons?

To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance

Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down.

Either he's dead or my watch has stopped.

Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately it kills all its students!

You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone.

It is better to be feared than loved, if you cannot be both.

Love: The warm feeling you get towards someone who meets your neurotic needs.

Love: The warm feeling you get towards someone who meets your neurotic needs.

Love: The warm feeling you get towards someone who meets your neurotic needs.

A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'

The instinct of nearly all societies is to lock up anybody who is truly free. First, society begins by trying to beat you up. If this fails, they try to poison you. If this fails too, the finish by loading honors on your head.

A good sermon should be like a woman's skirt: short enough to arouse interest but long enough to cover the essentials.

Pardon him, Theodotus; he is a barbarian, and thinks that the customs of his tribe and island are the laws of nature.

Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.

A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.

I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.

Yes, I'm fat, but you're ugly and I can go on a diet.

USA Today has come out with a new survey: Apparently three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population.

Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.

Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.

Humor is the only test of gravity, and gravity of humor; for a subject which will not bear raillery is suspicious, and a jest which will not bear serious examination is false wit.

I hate those men who would send into war youth to fight and die for them; the pride and cowardice of those old men, making their wars that boys must die.

The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.

Everything secret degenerates, even the administration of justice.

Before C++ we had to code all of our bugs by hand; now we inherit them.

Before C++ we had to code all of our bugs by hand; now we inherit them.

Sterling's Corollary to Clarke's Law: Any sufficiently advanced garbage is indistinguishable from magic.

After every 'victory' you have more enemies.

It's strange, isn't it. You stand in the middle of a library and go 'aaaaagghhhh' and everyone just stares at you. But you do the same thing on an aeroplane, and everyone joins in.

A coward is a hero with a wife, kids, and a mortgage.

The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins.

The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.

The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.

Love is the answer - but while you're waiting for the answer sex raises some pretty good questions.

Men are not disturbed by things, but the view they take of things.

You ask me if I keep a notebook to record my great ideas. I've only ever had one.

One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important.

What I am against is quotas. I am against hard quotas, quotas they basically delineate based upon whatever. However they delineate, quotas, I think, vulcanize society. So I don't know how that fits into what everybody else is saying, their relative positions, but that's my position.

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The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense.

The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense.

The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense.

Imitation is the sincerest form of television.

The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a 'C', the idea must be feasible.

Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something.

The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins.

The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins.

'Everything you say is boring and incomprehensible', she said, 'but that alone doesn't make it true.'

The purpose of computing is not numbers but insight.

I have four children which is not bad considering I'm not a Catholic.

When you hear hoofbeats, think of horses, not zebras.

Death is a low chemical trick played on everybody except sequoia trees.

The use of anthropomorphic terminology when dealing with computing systems is a symptom of professional immaturity.

We don't make mistakes, we just have happy little accidents.

Wit makes its own welcome and levels all distinctions.

Everything has been figured out, except how to live.

There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.

Happiness is good health and a bad memory.

God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.

In Germany they first came for the Communists, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Communist. Then they came for the Jews, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Jew. Then they came for the trade unionists, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a trade unionist. Then they came for the Catholics, and I didn't speak up because I was a Protestant. Then they came for me - and by that time no one was left to speak up.

Real Programmers always confuse Christmas and Halloween because Oct31 == Dec25 !

He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.

Of all the enemies to public liberty, war is perhaps the most to be dreaded because it comprises and develops the germ of every other.

I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them.

Throughout American history, the government has said we're in an unprecedented crisis and that we must live without civil liberties until the crisis is over. It's a hoax.

Real Programmers always confuse Christmas and Halloween because Oct31 == Dec25 !

Throughout American history, the government has said we're in an unprecedented crisis and that we must live without civil liberties until the crisis is over. It's a hoax.

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Whatever is begun in anger ends in shame.

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Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them.

To jaw-jaw is always better than to war-war.

Mit der Dummheit kämpfen Götter selbst vergebens

A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'

Men have become the tools of their tools.

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Always do right- this will gratify some and astonish the rest.

If thereÂ’s one thing I know itÂ’s God does love a good joke.

There is only one nature - the division into science and engineering is a human imposition, not a natural one. Indeed, the division is a human failure; it reflects our limited capacity to comprehend the whole. Bill Wulf-

Ketchup left overnight on dinner plates has a longer half-life than radioactive waste.

Death is a low chemical trick played on everybody except sequoia trees.

In Germany they first came for the Communists, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Communist. Then they came for the Jews, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Jew. Then they came for the trade unionists, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a trade unionist. Then they came for the Catholics, and I didn't speak up because I was a Protestant. Then they came for me - and by that time no one was left to speak up.

Happiness is good health and a bad memory.

Heaven is an American salary, a Chinese cook, an English house, and a Japanese wife. Hell is defined as having a Chinese salary, an English cook, a Japanese house, and an American wife.

If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?

The great thing about a computer notebook is that no matter how much you stuff into it, it doesn't get bigger or heavier.

If the United Nations once admits that international disputes can be settled by using force, then we will have destroyed the foundation of the organization and our best hope of establishing a world order.

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I know that there are people in this world who do not love their fellow human beings, and I hate people like that.

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Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action.

The only way to combat criminals is by not voting for them.

The most overlooked advantage of owning a computer is that if they foul up there's no law against whacking them around a bit.

There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of bread.

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Emulate your heros, but don't carry it too far. Especially if they are dead.

Be tolerant of the human race. Your whole family belongs to it -- and some of your spouse's family too.

I've had a wonderful time, but this wasn't it.

The most overlooked advantage of owning a computer is that if they foul up there's no law against whacking them around a bit.

The most overlooked advantage of owning a computer is that if they foul up there's no law against whacking them around a bit.

UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.

UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.

Always do right- this will gratify some and astonish the rest.

Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately it kills all its students!

When you've seen one non-sequitur, the price of tea in China.

I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.

The purpose of computing is not numbers but insight.

If all the world's managers were laid end to end, it would be an improvement.

If all the world's managers were laid end to end, it would be an improvement.

People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid.

After every 'victory' you have more enemies.

A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'

And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.

The longer I live the more I see that I am never wrong about anything, and that all the pains that I have so humbly taken to verify my notions have only wasted my time.

Research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I'm doing.

I admire the Pope. I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an album.

After every 'victory' you have more enemies.

I enjoyed reading your blog. Keep it that way.

Why was I with her? She reminds me of you. In fact, she reminds me more of you than you do!

The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts.

Heaven is an American salary, a Chinese cook, an English house, and a Japanese wife. Hell is defined as having a Chinese salary, an English cook, a Japanese house, and an American wife.

Louis Pasteur's theory of germs is ridiculous fiction.

Blessed is the man, who having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact.

To understand a man you should walk a mile in his shoes. If what he says still bothers you that's ok because you'll be a mile away from him and you'll have his shoes.

Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?

If FORTRAN has been called an infantile disorder, then PL/I must be classified as a fatal disease.

> > > Goodbye to all! Thanks for years of great fun and good > > > business! > > Suicide or MS C++? > Is there a difference? Suicide hurts only once...

Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with.

Many journalists have fallen for the conspiracy theory of government. I do assure you that they would produce more accurate work if they adhered to the cock-up theory.

If the United Nations once admits that international disputes can be settled by using force, then we will have destroyed the foundation of the organization and our best hope of establishing a world order.

The use of anthropomorphic terminology when dealing with computing systems is a symptom of professional immaturity.

The best way to predict the future is to invent it.

I'm fed up to the ears with old men dreaming up wars for young men to die in.

Dying is a very dull, dreary affair. And my advice to you is to have nothing whatever to do with it.

Democracy is where you can say what you think even if you don't think.

The company doesn't tell me what to say, and I don't tell themwhere to stick it.

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Honolulu, it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, and sharks for the wife's mother.

I'm trying to see things from your point of view but I can't get my head that far up my ass.

Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.

We are Dyslexia of Borg. Fusistance is retile. Your ass will be laminated.

We are Dyslexia of Borg. Fusistance is retile. Your ass will be laminated.

We are Dyslexia of Borg. Fusistance is retile. Your ass will be laminated.

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Total absence of humor renders life impossible.

A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.

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If it wasn't for C, we'd be writing programs in BASI, PASAL, and OBOL.

Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?

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I admire the Pope. I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an album.

Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.

I admire the Pope. I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an album.

They laughed when I said I'd be a comedian. They aren't laughing now.

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Yes, I'm fat, but you're ugly and I can go on a diet.

Men are not disturbed by things, but the view they take of things.

I'd stop eating chocolate, but I'm no quitter.

A coward is a hero with a wife, kids, and a mortgage.

The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts.

Finagle's Law of Dynamic Negatives: Anything that can go wrong, will -- at the worst possible moment.

We must all hear the universal call to like your neighbor like you like to be liked yourself.

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Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately it kills all its students!

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy next to me.

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A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.

It is a miracle that curiosity survives formal education.

If you are going through hell, keep going.

Everything has been figured out, except how to live.

Everything has been figured out, except how to live.

Marry me and I'll never look at another horse!

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.

He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.

Sometimes when reading Goethe I have the paralyzing suspicion that he is trying to be funny.

Sometimes when reading Goethe I have the paralyzing suspicion that he is trying to be funny.

My last cow just died, so I won't need your bull anymore.

The only rules comedy can tolerate are those of taste, and the only limitations those of libel.

The only rules comedy can tolerate are those of taste, and the only limitations those of libel.

Gentleman: Knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.

Many journalists have fallen for the conspiracy theory of government. I do assure you that they would produce more accurate work if they adhered to the cock-up theory.

Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.

Dying is a very dull, dreary affair. And my advice to you is to have nothing whatever to do with it.

Dying is a very dull, dreary affair. And my advice to you is to have nothing whatever to do with it.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

They show you how detergents take out bloodstains. I think if you've got a T-shirt with bloodstains all over it, maybe your laundry isn't your biggest problem.

I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.

Many journalists have fallen for the conspiracy theory of government. I do assure you that they would produce more accurate work if they adhered to the cock-up theory.

I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.

I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.

There is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably diserable.

Guard against the impostures of pretended patriotism.

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Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions - it only guarantees equality of opportunity.

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I never miss a chance to have sex or appear on television.

I could not possibly fail to disagree with you less.

I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have.

It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.

When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite.

A [pseudo]random number generator is much like sex: when it's good it's wonderful, and when it's bad it's still pretty good.

Wit makes its own welcome and levels all distinctions.

I took a course in speed reading and was able to read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It's about Russia.

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So I rang up a local building firm, I said 'I want a skip outside my house.' He said 'I'm not stopping you.'

If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?

I never miss a chance to have sex or appear on television.

Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?

All our knowledge merely helps us to die a more painful death than animals that know nothing.

Not only is there no God, but you try getting a plumber at weekends.

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.

Let him who takes the Plunge remember to return it by Tuesday.

I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them.

Why did God create dentists? -- In his infinite love, he thought it would be charitable to His creatures to let them see what Hell is like, during their lives.

If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.

If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.

A coward is a hero with a wife, kids, and a mortgage.

Whether you think that you can, or that you can't, you are usually right.

When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself.

Patriotism means to stand by the country. It does not mean to stand by the president or any other public official...

It's strange, isn't it. You stand in the middle of a library and go 'aaaaagghhhh' and everyone just stares at you. But you do the same thing on an aeroplane, and everyone joins in.

A state of war only serves as an excuse for domestic tyranny.

You got to be careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there.

A child of five could understand this. Fetch me a child of five.

The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them.

Once you've written TBicycle, you never forget how.

Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.

I think 'Hail to the Chief' has a nice ring to it.

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It was the experience of mystery -- even if mixed with fear -- that engendered religion.

My current job sucks so hard, black holes are going green with envy.

An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered.

If it wasn't for C, we'd be writing programs in BASI, PASAL, and OBOL.

I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave on a Saturday night and, most especially, never to shave a Gentile woman on a Saturday night.

I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave on a Saturday night and, most especially, never to shave a Gentile woman on a Saturday night.

I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave on a Saturday night and, most especially, never to shave a Gentile woman on a Saturday night.

Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.

If you're sick and tired of the politics of cynicism and polls and principles, come and join this campaign.

The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts.

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Maybe there is no actual place called hell. Maybe hell is just having to listen to our grandparents breathe through their noses when they're eating sandwiches.

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Maybe there is no actual place called hell. Maybe hell is just having to listen to our grandparents breathe through their noses when they're eating sandwiches.

Premature optimization is the root of all evil.

The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There's also a negative side

One morning I shot a bear in my pajamas. How it got into my pajamas I'll never know.

A sense of humor is part of the art of leadership, of getting along with people, of getting things done.

I could not possibly fail to disagree with you less.

In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But, in practice, there is.

Sometimes, the best answer is a more interesting question

Sometimes, the best answer is a more interesting question

Sometimes, the best answer is a more interesting question

Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft... and the only one that can be mass produced with unskilled labor.

The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.

I wouldn't mind dying - it's the business of having to stay dead that scares the shit out of me.

What a cruel thing is war: to separate and destroy families and friends, and mar the purest joys and happiness God has granted us in this world; to fill our hearts with hatred instead of love for our neighbors, and to devastate the fair face of this beautiful world.

What a cruel thing is war: to separate and destroy families and friends, and mar the purest joys and happiness God has granted us in this world; to fill our hearts with hatred instead of love for our neighbors, and to devastate the fair face of this beautiful world.

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.

If you try and take a cat apart to see how it works, the first thing you have in your hands is a non-working cat.

If you try and take a cat apart to see how it works, the first thing you have in your hands is a non-working cat.

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My current job sucks so hard, black holes are going green with envy.

A man can't get rich if he takes proper care of his family.

A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton of explanation.

Beware of bugs in the above code; I have only proven it correct, not tried it.

Modern capitalism is not about free markets, it is about building sufficient mass that the market gravitationally collapses around you.

When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the heavens, 'Why god? Why me?' and the thundering voice of God answered, 'There's just something about you that pisses me off.'

The truth is more important than the facts.

A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing but together can decide that nothing can be done.

I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.

Everything has been figured out, except how to live.

In ancient times they had no statistics so they had to fall back on lies.

If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into a committee -- that will do them in.

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.

It's dangerous to underestimate the intelligence of a customer who grew a business that's successful enough to require a large and complex set of software

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Ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you, but when you take him in a car he sticks his head out the window?

The role of the president of the United States is to support the decisions that are made by the people of Israel. It is not up to us to pick and choose from among the political parties.

Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.

We don't make mistakes, we just have happy little accidents.

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Military glory -- that attractive rainbow, that rises in showers of blood -- that serpent's eye, that charms to destroy...

Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.

If a man does his best, what else is there?

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Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.

Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.

When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the heavens, 'Why god? Why me?' and the thundering voice of God answered, 'There's just something about you that pisses me off.'

A child of five could understand this. Fetch me a child of five.

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Anyone who considers arithmetical methods of producing random digits is, of course, in a state of sin.

Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away.

Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away.

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Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions - it only guarantees equality of opportunity.

When ideas fail, words come in very handy.

Patriotism means to stand by the country. It does not mean to stand by the president or any other public official...

The secret of creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.

Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.

Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.

Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.

Each problem that I solved became a rule which served afterwards to solve other problems.

Hearing nuns' confessions is like being stoned to death with popcorn.

The question of whether a computer can think is no more interesting than the question of whether a submarine can swim.

Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish.

An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered.

Did you hear Nike's new slogan for Tiger Woods? Just do me.

I don't approve of political jokes... I've seen too many of them get elected.

Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately it kills all its students!

I wouldn't mind dying - it's the business of having to stay dead that scares the shit out of me.

I wouldn't mind dying - it's the business of having to stay dead that scares the shit out of me.

A single death is a tragedy, a million deaths is a statistic.

If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me.

If people can judge me on the company I keep, they would judge me with keeping really good company with Laura.

How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself.

I don't approve of political jokes... I've seen too many of them get elected.

Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.

We are not retreating - we are advancing in another Direction.

Paramount among the responsibilities of a free press is the duty to prevent any part of the government from deceiving the people.

Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritations and resentments slip away and a sunny spirit takes their place.

Biologically speaking, if something bites you it's more likely to be female.

Make everything as simple as possible, but not simpler.

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Once you've written TBicycle, you never forget how.

Humor is a rubber sword - it allows you to make a point without drawing blood.

I'd stop eating chocolate, but I'm no quitter.

I have four children which is not bad considering I'm not a Catholic.

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.

Many a man's reputation would not know his character if they met on the street.

It's clearly a budget. It's got a lot of numbers in it.

We have art to save ourselves from the truth.

If all the world's managers were laid end to end, it would be an improvement.

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I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.

I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.

As the post said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on.

Everything has been figured out, except how to live.

I think 'Hail to the Chief' has a nice ring to it.

Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something.

A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing but together can decide that nothing can be done.

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important.

The belief in the possibility of a short decisive war appears to be one of the most ancient and dangerous of human illusions.

Elegance is not a dispensable luxury but a factor that decides between success and failure.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days.

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In related news, a lion wouldn't cheat on his wife, but a Tiger Wood.

A narcissist is someone better looking than you are.

If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens?

Few things are harder to put up with than a good example.

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Ask people why they have deer heads on their walls and they tell you it's because they're such beautiful animals. I think my wife is beautiful, but I only have photographs of her on the wall.

The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.

If you need more than five lines to prove something, then you are on the wrong track

Hearing nuns' confessions is like being stoned to death with popcorn.

All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You'd be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men.

Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish.

Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish.

I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.

The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his.

Java, the best argument for Smalltalk since C++.

A picture is worth a thousand words (which is why it takes a thousand times longer to load...)

It is better to be quotable than to be honest.

The only rules comedy can tolerate are those of taste, and the only limitations those of libel.

Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.

I admire the Pope. I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an album.

Under conditions of competition, standards are set by the morally least reputable agent.

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Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.

A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.

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If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me.

In this war – as in others – I am less interested in honoring the dead than in preventing the dead.

Imitation is the sincerest form of television.

Before C++ we had to code all of our bugs by hand; now we inherit them.

We are not retreating - we are advancing in another Direction.

Statistics is like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive. What they conceal is vital.

When the rich think about the poor, they have poor ideas.

True. When your hammer is C++, everything begins to look like a thumb.

Biologically speaking, if something bites you it's more likely to be female.

Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.

To sit alone with my conscience will be judgment enough for me.

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In this war – as in others – I am less interested in honoring the dead than in preventing the dead.

Victory goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake.

I've had a wonderful time, but this wasn't it.

I've had a wonderful time, but this wasn't it.

It is better to be quotable than to be honest.

The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts.

A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.

An effective way to deal with predators is to taste terrible.

Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.

Why did God create dentists? -- In his infinite love, he thought it would be charitable to His creatures to let them see what Hell is like, during their lives.

Object-oriented programming is a style of programming designed to teach students about stacks.

Lohr's Law: The future is merely the past with a twist — and better tools.

Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head.

If you give a man a fish, he will eat for today. If you teach him to fish, he'll understand why some people think golf is exciting.

Never test for an error condition you don't know how to handle.

We should leave our minds open, but not so open that our brains fall out.

Whether you think that you can, or that you can't, you are usually right.

I criticize by creation - not by finding fault.

Dying is a very dull, dreary affair. And my advice to you is to have nothing whatever to do with it.

First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.

Tact is the ability to tell a man he has an open mind when he has a hole in his head.

The Bible was a consolation to a fellow alone in the old cell. The lovely thin paper with a bit of matress stuffing in it, if you could get a match, was as good a smoke as I ever tasted.

If you can read this you're not aiming in the right direction.

I took a course in speed reading and was able to read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It's about Russia.

Multitasking /adj./ 3 PCs and a chair with wheels !

We should leave our minds open, but not so open that our brains fall out.

Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.

A hen is only an eggÂ’s way of making another egg.

A physicist is an atom's way of knowing about atoms.

C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg.

The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them.

We are not retreating - we are advancing in another Direction.

Yes, I'm fat, but you're ugly and I can go on a diet.

Yes, I'm fat, but you're ugly and I can go on a diet.

Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called 'Ego'.

I'd stop eating chocolate, but I'm no quitter.

I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.

God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.

All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.

A coward is a hero with a wife, kids, and a mortgage.

Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious.

UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.

I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.

Emulate your heros, but don't carry it too far. Especially if they are dead.

Against stupidity the (very) gods themselves contend in vain

Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent.

The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There's also a negative side

A camel is a horse designed by a committee

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If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.

If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.

You'll notice that Nancy Reagan never drinks water when Ronnie speaks.

Love is the answer - but while you're waiting for the answer sex raises some pretty good questions.

A terrorist is someone who has a bomb, but doesn't have an air force.

Just because bulldozers are used to build highways doesn't mean bulldozers are the best way to travel on a highway.

I have seen the future and it is just like the present, only longer.

I don't believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.

I choose a block of marble and chop off whatever I don't need.

I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.

Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives.

Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives.

We totally deny the allegations, and we are trying to identify the allegators.

Did you ever walk in a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives.

Did you ever walk in a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives.

A scholar who cherishes the love of comfort is not fit to be deemed a scholar.

Devlin's First Law - Buyer beware: in the hands of a charlatan, mathematics can be used to make a vacuous argument look impressive. Devlin's Second Law - So can PowerPoint.

In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But, in practice, there is.

No one can earn a million dollars honestly.

What I am against is quotas. I am against hard quotas, quotas they basically delineate based upon whatever. However they delineate, quotas, I think, vulcanize society. So I don't know how that fits into what everybody else is saying, their relative positions, but that's my position.

Computer Science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes

Every journalist has a novel in him, which is an excellent place for it.

I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.

We are Dyslexia of Borg. Fusistance is retile. Your ass will be laminated.

Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.

Our children are not born to hate, they are raised to hate.

He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.

He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.

Happiness is good health and a bad memory.

Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.

Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.